On the dating apps, how do you know if it’s a jerk (or not)?

Sur les applis de rencontres, comment savoir si c

Alexandra Raillan, who publishes “Cupidon DeuxPointZéro”, a practical guide to avoid bastards on the Net, helps us to decipher online behavior. So does he stink or not?

Hidden behind our mobile or our computer, we seek great love but above all, clues. Because before going to the next step and daring to go on a physical date, we would like to know if the boy we are talking to is there for one night or more. So here we return a sentence, magnify a photo, trying to “feel” his expectations. Toquard or serious boy? How to guess it? Is it possible ? How far to go to find out? We met Alexandra Raillan, who just came out Two Point Zero Cupid at Editions Marabout, a useful and very well-constructed guide, which helps everyone to find love online by avoiding the traps.

It spells mistakes, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : If we are faced with typos, it will pass. But CP level mistakes or SMS language, that sucks. We are still there to get to know each other through written communication, so the least you can do is make an effort! After that, it all depends on what you are looking for. Some people don’t really care about a well-spelled word. But if it is important for us and that we fall on a “hi its going”, we will not get out … And finally, we note that if the man corrects his faults, it’s cute . This means that he rereads and pays attention.

He wants to see me right away, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : It smells of an evening’s plan and it’s not embarrassing if you expect the same thing … But it can also be a good thing when looking for a serious relationship. We accept an appointment, rather in the afternoon, for a quick coffee and we quickly know what to expect. Seeing yourself quickly allows you to feel the ground, to feel full nose precisely. We avoid saying yes for a late date with one or the other, especially if we hope for something other than sex, because this approach sends pig signals.

He only talks about him, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : It depends if he says interesting things. When someone talks about himself, you have to listen to him, he gives information, so it doesn’t necessarily stink, it allows you to learn more, to ask questions, to cross-check. However, if it’s in a loop (me, me, me), we are faced with self-centeredness. But it is the behavior that stinks the most. We let talk, we can even meet and we advise afterwards. Could we have placed one?

He announces that he is freshly separated, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : It stinks, because we can obviously imagine that he registered on the app in search of a bandage. He is probably trying to soften us … And it really stinks if he is going through separation and he is still living with his ex. If he’s really separated, it stinks less, but still. It is in the phase of acute consumption and it is better to let it wander. We avoid being immediately available, because he is certainly not available for a serious story. You can still see it quickly to find out more, without having an idea and without fantasizing it. We will find out what his past is and if it’s worth it or not to give him a chance. Otherwise, we put it warm.

He sends me Alexandrians, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : It stinks a little. It is a flirting technique and that means that he copies and sticks his poems in order to charm the girls. It’s a bit dated and not at all personalized. Immediate declarations of this type, it sucks and it scares. One can also imagine that he is shy. To see how much it affects us!

He immediately asks me what I’m looking for here, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : It doesn’t stink, because it sets the conditions, it’s not that stupid. But I advise not to answer. The man opposite can use our response to get what he wants. If we tell him to look for seriousness, he will answer that he too and we will darken with eyes closed (damage). It is better to remain vague, because conversely, we are not going to say looking for an evening plan if this is not the case. To reveal yourself, it is good to feel that the person opposite is sincere. When in doubt and because the screens give us few clues, we will reply that we are not looking for anything, since we have lost nothing. And we discuss everything and nothing to get to know each other.

He poses on his photo in sunglasses, big muscles and mouth at heart, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : you have to see the rest of the photos, it may be just humor. Let’s not forget that the photos give real clues because people take time to take them and carefully choose the ones they want to post. So we imagine that this man wanted to show himself so … To see if it is our universe. In any case, we know what kind of photos we will take during our future couple vacation.

He cut his photo, I see a girl’s hair in the corner, does it stink or not?

La response from Alexandra Raillan : It’s not very delicate, but it sucks less than when they are several guys and we don’t know who our contender is. If there is just hair and the photo is cut, we can imagine that he deleted his sister, his ex or a friend, but the good news is that he took the time to do it . And it also means that he may not have many pictures of him, which is touching. He does not embark on terrible selfies …

He asks me what I’m doing, right now, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : It depends on what time it is … If it’s late, it can set the scene. But it all depends on the other clues it sends. It may be a way to get to know us. When in doubt, we reply that we are … responding. And we see how the discussion continues.

He doesn’t have pictures, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s answer: it stinks, but it is possible to find love without a photo. Some witnesses entrusted it to me when writing the book! It’s like apartments after all. Sometimes we don’t take photos because of the job. Generally, I’m more for matches with photos, even a landscape shot or anything else. We can go ahead anyway, chat, then ask for a photo in private. If he persists in hiding, it stinks more and more. Especially since we take the risk of idealizing it. But why not, if something mysterious charms us.

He talks about sex right away, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : The beginnings of a relationship set the scene. If we position it on sex, it risks being only sexual. It’s not great and it stinks a little.

It is only beautiful in a photo, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : We take the most beautiful, the ugliest, and we tell ourselves that the truth is in between. We don’t idealize, we don’t run away, we don’t get stuck on either of them. Reality will tell us.

He says he’s new to the app, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : It stinks because it can be a trick of sioux so that opposite, we lower the guard and do not suspect it queutard (oh it is cute, it is brand new, it will not be perverted by the Tinder system or other…). Warning ! As soon as we give him our number, he removes our match from the app and we no longer see where it is located geographically… What is he hiding? His seniority, perhaps?

He doesn’t understand my humor, does it stink or not?

Alexandra Raillan’s response : Not at all ! Humor in writing is not easy. We’ll see IRL. And then, at worst, we will fall in love anyway, we will get married, we will not always laugh at the same things … But at least this one.

Want to tell about your experiences that stink or don’t stink? See you on the Facebook page of Cupidon DeuxPointZéro.

To read :
Cupid DeuxPointZéro, finds his man (or not …) on the Net

By Alexandra Raillan
Ed. Marabout
6.50 euros

Two PointZero Cupid © Marabout

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